No more Fourth of July!

This morning, breakfast consists of coke and an everything bagel with cream cheese. This will explain the rambling entry today. Probably not the healthiest breakfast, but what can you do? My husband and son had chocolate chip mini muffins. I should be nominated for wife/mother of the year!

"Hi, Jenny Craig? I've got some more clients for you. Yes, it's my family. I've fattened them up real good!"

I’m actually looking forward to this weekend. First, it’s a three-day weekend. Next, I plan to go (with the family) out to look at houses. We are not really planning to move anytime soon. I just really love to look at houses. It’s inspiring. It’s like watching live HGTV. I can look at something and then think about how that would work in my house. What if we rearranged the furniture that way? What about painting the bathroom that color? We also have an adult party to go to this weekend. Do you know how long it’s been since we’ve been to an adult party? I think it was April when we went to a friend’s 30th birthday party. Her husband had a surprise party thrown for her in one of the skyboxes in the football stadium here. I remember they served beer and wine and none of it was in a sippy cup. I also remember that I didn’t have to clean up anyone with pre-moistened wipes after they were done eating. A grand affair! So, I am really looking forward to going to an event that does not include the Wiggles. Also, it’s the Fourth of July and that means Hot Thomas BBQ! Can you feel the excitement? I’m being totally serious.

And...if we get that yearly call from a certain couple who always try to "get together" at the last minute when it is totally inconvenient - here's what I say to you - "No more Fourth of July! No more fireworks!" Yes, I would like to have a van load of mean looking men kill me while your stupid wife calls them "assholes" from the back seat of your tiny car. Ummmm...no. Bigger car = right of way.

Also, eating an everything bagel while trying to work is not a good idea. I don’t think people want poppy seeds in their French literature.

Eye against eye

Well, the eye surgery went well. There is a little soreness but overall the doctor said that everything went well and that the retina looks good. Thank God for that. You don’t really want anything to go wrong with eye surgery. Especially surgery on those blue eyes. My husband did really well. I don’t think I could have dealt with that as well as he did.

Sometimes, I think I get a lot of strength from my husband. I’m sure I don’t thank him enough for it. He is strong in ways that I have never been. I think we compliment each other in that way. That makes for a pretty good marriage – sometimes crazy – but still pretty good.

I think I have been pretty cranky for the past year. Especially to him. He’s put up with it for the most part. I’ve been working on it and I think I’m getting better. I think that sometimes we take each other for granted. I don’t think we make enough time for ourselves as a couple because we are too busy being parents, employees, homeowners, sons, daughters, etc. Sometimes, we leave the couple part behind because it’s easy to. I don’t know if other couples do that. I would like to think that we aren’t the only ones. I feel like I am so busy being a mom that I don’t have time to be anything else. It’s hard to take on such a big responsibility and not lose some of your previous identity. I need to find more of a balance. We need to find more of a balance. I know that is why I am cranky. I’m trying too hard to be everything. I'm working against myself.

Anyway, I just wanted to comment on the surgery and to say that I am glad it went well.

Private eyes - private wees, she's watching you!

Thursday, my husband is having eye surgery. Not like a scalpel or anything, it’s laser. He went in for an eye exam and they found a tear in his retina. Now, the ophthalmologist wants to “patch” the tear so that my husband doesn’t wake up one morning with a detached retina. Do retinas always detach during sleep? Can it detach while driving? Where did this idea of “waking up” with a detached retina come from? (okay, sorry about that – too many Seinfeld reruns)

I have been watching my son on the Internet. His daycare has web cams and it can be addictive. I’ve been watching him this week because he has switched to a new class. Sometimes, watching him makes me just want to cry. For example, I just watched him sitting at a little table with about eight other kids, eating lunch. It was like a roundtable of toddlers! You know that the table conversation went something like this, “Please pass the fish sticks. I am a little hungry today. How’s that new Elmo video? No, I still haven’t tried Pull-Ups.” Actually, I’m sure the table conversation was more like, “Baaaaa Baaaaa. Da Da Da, Dooo Dooo Dooo, Buh Buh Buh.” But in toddler town that translates into intelligent conversation – it has to. He is growing up so fast. Just seeing him sitting at that table with the other kids was so sweet. Next thing you know, he will be off to college and I will have no idea where the time went.

(Note to toddler girls in the area, especially Miss Emily: When you are older, like in your twenties, please stay away from my son. Right now, I refuse to believe that he will grow any older than 15 months so I can’t even bear to think about him finding someone else that he wants to spend his life with. Why wouldn’t he want to spend his life watching Disney Channel, driving around the kitchen in a plastic car, and reading Goodnight Moon – even if he is 24 with a degree in architecture? So, don’t even make me go through the heartache, okay?)

If you make a fist and hold it over your heart, I will be there

So today is my eighth anniversary. Yes, believe it or not, I have been married to the same person for eight years. Heck, I've actually known him for eleven years! Why hasn't he run off yet? If you will indulge me for a moment, I would like to use this space to recap some of the last eight years of my life.

June 8, 1996
The wedding is scheduled for 2pm. It's an outdoor wedding and it is raining. Nasty humid rain that kills hair. I remember sitting in an upstairs bedroom (we were married in the yard of an old house)looking out the window dressed in my wedding gown, just hoping the rain would stop. But wait! At 1:45 pm, the rain stops, the sun comes out and all is well. At least for that day.

April 1997
We finally move out of the basement apartment in "beautiful" Statham, Georgia. You know, the apartment that really shouldn't have been an apartment. Besides the redneck neighbors who packed up in the middle of the night to avoid paying rent, the bathroom above us that leaked all over our washer and dryer, and the crazy parvo neighbors (all their dogs died of parvo - vaccines anyone?), we lived with the hum of a dehumidifier.

June 1998
I go back to school. My husband just doesn't seem to deal with enough problems. Now he can deal with me stressing out about read and reacts and grant proposals and then proofread everything I write. This man should be a saint.

1999
I can't seem to remember much about 1999. Did it really happen?

August 2000
I'm finally done with school. My husband is still sane and our marriage is intact. I guess we took those vows seriously. We are raking in the dough now. Wait, I'm a librarian.

February 2001
We buy a house! It's in the neighborhood that we want, the house seems big enough, the yard is nice and we are just thrilled. Long talk at the kitchen table - maybe this house could use another person. Um, not until the siding is done.

June 2002
This house will finally have another tenant. We are in shock. Happy shock, shock none the less. What do we do now?

February 2003
Welcome William! I need some sleep. It's your turn to see what the crying is about. If our marriage survives this, we are invincible. I'm heading for a meltdown. I can feel it.

June 2004
It's not over yet. Is this house getting smaller? Hey, I just stepped on a paci. Has someone seen Teddy?

Thank you to my wonderful husband on this special day. Your quiet calmness has never faltered during these past eight years. You and your "twin" are what get me through each day. I can only ask that you continue to believe in us.

Working harder to get better....

It's a bird. It's a skank...it's Supermom!

Okay, last night my in-laws decided that they wanted all of us to go to dinner at Cracker Barrel. They have some kind of love affair with Cracker Barrel. Anyway, I leave work, rush to daycare to pick up my son, rush home to change a diaper, grab a sippy cup and let the dog out, then back in the car to go to dinner. We had to meet at 6:00. I think I was home for a total of three minutes – most of that was eaten up by the diaper change.

So, I don’t mind Cracker Barrel. Actually, my son is a big vegetable eater and so he will throw down on some green beans and mashed potatoes at the Barrel. I was very happy last night because his green beans and potatoes did not wind up on me. He ate and ate and ate – which meant he slept and slept and slept last night. Woo Hoo!

Anytime we go out to eat it’s a team effort. I usually get the first shift while my husband eats. My food usually gets cold (unless it was cold to begin with - like salad) while I make sure that my son eats and doesn’t disturb anyone else at the table or the restaurant. When my husband is done, he takes over and it usually works out well. Cold food doesn’t bother me. If you ever ate my mother’s cooking, you would understand.

My brother-in-law’s wife (Squat or Skank. Whichever you prefer – I really don’t like her) has a different way of eating out with her child. She positions her child next to Grammy. Grammy spends most of her meal dealing with the child while Squat/Skank eats her meal and chats it up with anyone and everyone. I’m talking “turn your back and ignore the fact that your child is putting her bare feet all over the table and grabbing at Grammy’s food while throwing her own.” And that is what happened last night. But, Grammy is quick to give me tips on things that Squat/Skank did with her child. Yes, I need that advice because I have done such a horrible job with my well-behaved, well-adjusted son. Tonight I will teach him how to scream and kick off his shoes so he can stick his feet in people’s food. I think he is ready.

So, if you are trying to be Supermom, make sure that someone like Grammy is there to actually watch and attempt to discipline your child. Then, ignore your child and when they act up as a result of you not paying attention to them – ignore them some more or tell your husband to take care of it

All this time I have been paying attention to my son. What was I thinking?

Keep On Lovin' You

Driving into work this morning I heard REO Speedwagon’s “Keep On Lovin’ You” on the radio. Whoa. That brought back some really strange pre-teen memories for me.

I bought the tape Hi-Infidelity when it was new. I was so into that tape. I knew every song and listened to that tape over and over. I played it on my boom box that my dad “recovered” from some kind of burglary bust – he was a cop at the time. Does that make sense? Here is a stolen radio – cop recovers it – takes it home and gives it to pre-teen daughter. Isn’t that just stealing something stolen? Double-stealing? I can’t say that my dad was the most ethical person in the world. To this day, he would probably still say there was no problem with what he did. Hell, I didn’t care. I was ten or eleven. I also inherited a Rush Moving Pictures tape that was inside. Way cool for a ten year-old. “All the world to me’s a stage, we are merely players…” Jam out!

Anyway, I spent my summers at the Jersey Shore. We had a boat and we lived on it all summer during my pre-teen and early teen years. There were a group of kids around my age that lived on their boats during the summer (mostly older) that would hang out. We would play cards, go crabbing, go to the boardwalk, and buy all the cool shell jewelry that we could wear at this little shop across the street from the marina. Hi-Infidelity was the theme tape one summer. I remember sitting on my friend Demi’s family’s boat, looking through the latest issue of Glamour magazine dreaming of making my hair look just like Kim Alexis’ hair (remember Kim Alexis?) while Hi-Infidelity was playing. Then, we all sat down and ate the crabs we caught that day. We were the cool kids of the marina. We were the only kids at the marina. We were cool by default.

So, hearing “Keep on Lovin’ You” this morning brought back some memories. Isn’t it strange how a song can make you think about something from your past?